I have heard enough out of you
in those small orders barked
down spiral staircases
echoing off the brick
against my ears caught
in the gears of this machinery.
You look out for you
and I do the same
and we pretend that there
are no games in between
the way we talk about
our nightly dreams.
I want to stay out of the desert
even though its warmth
can bring me comfort
and the isolating dunes
shift like the ocean in slow motion
right in front of me.
I want to let the tarantula
spin webs between my fingers
so I can look through
all the matrices and figure out
what’s keeping me from changing.
I want to be as happy as the few
who ride their bikes to work
in rain or shine and do not whine
about the purposes they’re serving.
I wish I could be like they are
all so happy just to be here
and sure to steer clear
of the hatred I am fighting with;
with knives made out of fire
and some metal from a fence
of mostly wire.
I’ve never flagged down a taxi
with my voice and just a hand raised
in the air, but I would like to care
like they do
always helping distant strangers
down the road like there’s a secret code
that we all know that brings us close
together when we need it to.
So I guess I’ll sit and wait here
for a few.